Please Pay To Make Them Stop

Customer: “I’m done doing my copies over there.”
Me: “Oh, great. Did they turn out okay?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Good.”
Customer: “Where do I pay?”
Me: “You paid already.”
Customer: “No, I didn’t; the machine told me to take my card out.”
Me: “Yes, the new machine doesn’t require your card to stay in the whole time. The good thing about that is people won’t forget their cards anymore!”
Customer: “Okay, but I still haven’t paid.”
Me: “Yes, you have.”
Customer: “No! I put my card in and then it told me to take it out!”
Me: “Yes, because it remembers your card. You hit “end session” on the screen when you were finished, right?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Did it ask you if you wanted a receipt?”
Customer: “Yes. It’s right here. But I want you to print me a new one so you can prove that I’ve paid.”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “I have a receipt here, but I don’t think it’s true because I didn’t leave my card in.”
Me: “You don’t have to leave your card in. That receipt will be correct. And the next person’s job will not be charged to your card, because you hit “end session”.”
Customer: “Okay, but how do I know that this receipt isn’t lying?”
Me: “Why would it be lying?”
Customer: “Because my card wasn’t in the machine while I did my copies!”
Me: “But it’s not supposed to be. That’s how the new machine works. I can print you another receipt over here if you want.”

(The customer gives me her card, and I print her receipt, which is identical to the one that came out of the copier.)

Me: “See? It’s the same.”
Customer: “But how does it know?”
Me: “I don’t know; it’s just smart I guess!”
Customer: “No! HOW does it know!? HOW does it work!?”
Me: “You mean how does the technology work?”
Customer: “Yes! It’s blowing my mind!”
Me: “Um, I don’t know how it works; I’m sorry. It will just have to continue to blow your mind.”