BlackBerry Messenger launching on iOS ‘before the end of summer’, CEO confirms

First, it was going to be available “this summer”. Now, it is coming “before the end of this summer”. I’m referring to BlackBerry’s way overdue iOS and Android edition of the Messenger software which once used to be the primary reason teenagers in emerging markets opted for BlackBery handsets.

Company CEO Thorsten Heins made the new timeframe official during a quarterly earnings call this morning, while revealing disappointing results…

According to MobileSyrup, the free BlackBerry Messenger app will support devices running iOS 6 or later and Android OS 4.0 or higher. As for the iOS edition, initially the app will be limited to messaging and groups.

Advanced features such as voice, screen sharing and the BBM Channels will be added via future updates at a later stage.


More at iHash.eu

BlackBerry rolls out Secure Work Space to iOS and Android

Canadian smartphone maker BlackBerry today announced Secure Work Space, a new option for increased enterprise security on iOS and Android devices. Part of BlackBerry Enterprise Services 10, Secure Work Space extends BlackBerry security for iOS and Android smartphones and tablets without the need for a VPN infrastructure. Specifically, the option provides secure email, calendar, contacts and browser, as well as secure document management and work app deployment…

According to a media release, the solution enables customers to separate work from personal data without having to rely on the pricey VPN infrastructures to access enterprise data behind corporate firewalls.

BlackBerry provides security at the device, server and network level. Secure Work Space leverages the same trusted behind-the-firewall connection available for BlackBerry smartphones and extends BlackBerry security capabilities for data-at-rest and data-in-transit to iOS and Android devices.

More at iHash.eu

Please Pay To Make Them Stop

Customer: “I’m done doing my copies over there.”
Me: “Oh, great. Did they turn out okay?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Good.”
Customer: “Where do I pay?”
Me: “You paid already.”
Customer: “No, I didn’t; the machine told me to take my card out.”
Me: “Yes, the new machine doesn’t require your card to stay in the whole time. The good thing about that is people won’t forget their cards anymore!”
Customer: “Okay, but I still haven’t paid.”
Me: “Yes, you have.”
Customer: “No! I put my card in and then it told me to take it out!”
Me: “Yes, because it remembers your card. You hit “end session” on the screen when you were finished, right?”
Customer: “Yes.”
Me: “Did it ask you if you wanted a receipt?”
Customer: “Yes. It’s right here. But I want you to print me a new one so you can prove that I’ve paid.”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “I have a receipt here, but I don’t think it’s true because I didn’t leave my card in.”
Me: “You don’t have to leave your card in. That receipt will be correct. And the next person’s job will not be charged to your card, because you hit “end session”.”
Customer: “Okay, but how do I know that this receipt isn’t lying?”
Me: “Why would it be lying?”
Customer: “Because my card wasn’t in the machine while I did my copies!”
Me: “But it’s not supposed to be. That’s how the new machine works. I can print you another receipt over here if you want.”

(The customer gives me her card, and I print her receipt, which is identical to the one that came out of the copier.)

Me: “See? It’s the same.”
Customer: “But how does it know?”
Me: “I don’t know; it’s just smart I guess!”
Customer: “No! HOW does it know!? HOW does it work!?”
Me: “You mean how does the technology work?”
Customer: “Yes! It’s blowing my mind!”
Me: “Um, I don’t know how it works; I’m sorry. It will just have to continue to blow your mind.”

The Key To Karma

(A sour-looking customer comes in to check in. Throughout, I try to remain polite and friendly, but he just grunts and snatches his key out of my hand and goes up to his room. A few minutes later, he storms back in, and flings the keycards at me.)

Customer: “THESE KEYS DON’T WORK!”

Me: “I’m sorry about that; maybe I made a mistake keying them.”

(I check the system.)

Me: “Huh, these say that they are working. Are you sure that you went to the right room?”

Customer: “I went to 510!”

Me: “It says 518.”

(The customer turns pale, snatches the keys again, and storms off. I don’t hear from him again, so I guess he got the right room. Meanwhile, I get a nasty call from the person who was in room 510, saying that someone had tried to break down her door, screaming!)

They Paid The Price

(I work in the print and copy area of my store. A customer is giving my new coworker a hard time about the cost of copying. I walk over.)

Customer: “Your prices are OUTRAGEOUS; I refuse to pay that much! You’re an idiot! You’re all idiots! You should be doing this for free for me, because of how dumb you all are!”

Me: “What my coworker has explained to you is correct. We price match all of our competitors, and I can guarantee you that we have the cheapest price.”

Customer: “I will NEVER use your services. You are thieves who are trying to rip-off an old woman! I will take my business elsewhere!”

(The customer storms out.)

Coworker: “I bet she’ll be back.”

(A few hours later, the customer returns.)

Customer: *meekly and very politely* “I’d like this done, please.”

Half my screen has disappeared!

An client of mine who provides interim financial management solutions for very large companies (FTSE 100) phoned me up one day.

"Ruairi, I'm in terrible trouble!"

"What's up?"

"Half my screen has disappeared!"

"OK, can you see the Start button and the time?"

"Yes. It's Excel, half the screen has gone!"

"OK, can you see the Microsoft Excel title at the top and the X to close the window at the top right?"

"I can only see the Microsoft Excel part."

"Uh, ok, have you moved the window to the right or something?"

"How do I do that?"

"Click and hold the left mouse button at the top of the window where the blue strip is, then move the mouse to reposition it."

"Goodness me you're a genius, I don't know how we'd cope without you!"

This is after using PC's for around 15 years. Amazing! :)

Making A Spectacles Of One Self

(I am working in the emergency department. I am tending to an elderly woman who is accompanied by her middle-aged daughter. The woman’s daughter has just sent a text.)

Daughter: “Well, I hope he can read what I typed, because I can’t see anything without my glasses.”

Mother: “You do know that you have a pair of glasses on your head, don’t you?”

(A look of embarrassment crosses the woman’s face, and her mother bursts out laughing hysterically. I smile and turn to the mother.)

Me: “It’s nice when someone else does that for a change, isn’t it?”

(The mother has a big smile on her face.)

Today’s (25.06.13) iOS free apps

Here is list of today’s free iOS Apps.

League of Evil 2 - Ravenous Games Inc.

Busmapper - Citymapper Limited

PasswordWallet - Password Manager - Selznick Scientific Software, LLC

Cling! - First5 Games

AirMovie - Enjoy the videos in your PC anytime, anywhere with NO ENCODING!! - Peepleware

SimplyRain - Reactor LLC

Permanent — The New Spreadsheet - Permanent Co.

Typic Pro - Hi Mom S.A.S

The Light Camera - Mark I - Stuck In Customs

Time Trap - Hidden Objects - Crisp App Ltd.


More at iHash.eu

The Opposite Of Disappearing Ink

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but it looks like this prescription is expired.”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “The law says we can’t take prescriptions this old.”

Customer: “But you said it’s expired. Where does it say that?”

Me: “It doesn’t, but see the date? That’s several months old. We couldn’t fill it now if we tried.”

Customer: “You’re telling me if I’d brought this in exactly as it is just a few months ago, you’d have been able to take it?”

Me: “Theoretically, yes.”

Customer: “So why won’t you take it now? Nothing’s changed!”

Me: “Except today’s date, sir. The prescription expired a few weeks after it was written. You can even see the disclaimer written at the bottom.”

Customer: “So why doesn’t it notify me when it expires? It ought to say ‘expired’ on it!”

Me: “Um… the paper isn’t going to magically print the word ‘expired’ if you wait too long to bring it in.”

Customer: “Well, it should!”

I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away

"Word Perfect Technical support; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
"Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
"What's a monitor?"
"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
"I don't know."
"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
....."Yes, I think so."
"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
....."Yes, it is."
"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
"No."
"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
....."Okay, here it is."
"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
"I can't reach it."
"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
"No."
"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."
"Dark?"
"Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
"Well, turn on the office light then."
"I can't."
"No? Why not?"
"Because there's a power outage."
"A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
"Well, yes. I keep them in the closet."
"Good! Go get them and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
"Really! Is it that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid it is."
"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

A Cent-less Attack

(I’m taking money at the first window. A car pulls up with a middle-aged customer driving, and what looks to be her older mother in the passenger seat.)

Me: “Hi, your total is—.”

Mother: “Where do we get my food?! I’m hungry! This line is taking too long!”

Daughter: “You have to pay first, mom.”

Mother: “I’m getting it!”

(She scrounges around for money in her purse. She hands me what’s supposed to be exact change. I count it three times, and she’s a penny short.)

Me: “Ma’am, do you have a penny?”

Mother: “Are you serious? I’m not giving you no d*** penny! Where’s my food?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I need that penny, or my till will come out short.”

Mother: “And I said you ain’t getting no d*** penny!”

(She starts shouting at her daughter.)

Mother: “Drive to the next window!”

(The daughter looks horrified about her mother’s behavior, and doesn’t move.)

Mother: “Fine! I’ll get it myself!”

(The mother gets out of the car, and starts walking toward the next window.)

Me: “Ma’am, can you please get back in your car?”

Mother: “F*** you!”

(The daughter is horrified, apologizes to me, and drives forward. A minute later, I see the mother walk back to my open window as I’m paying out another customer. She throws a penny at me, which hits me in the knuckle and bruises it.)

Mother: “There’s your d*** penny!”

How big is a million floppies?

Just had quite a classic incident here. A woman had come in to collect her laptop - she'd managed to drop it down the stairs, so the techies here had just restored all her stuff from backup after repairs.

So she was telling us she'd bought a new 1TB drive for backups. The conversation went like this:

Her: How big is 1 terabyte?

Techie: Umm...

H: You know those old 100MB floppy disks?

T: You mean zip disks?

H: No, not zip disks. Floppies. (A floppy was produced at this point, she handled it and confirmed that was the right one).

H: How many floppies would fit in a terabyte?

T: oh... umm... getting on for a million?!

H: A million? How big is a million floppies?

T: what?!

H: How big would it be? Would a million floppies fit in this room?

T: wtf? why?

H: I need to know how big it is for my backups.

T: i've no idea if a million floppies would fit in the room! Work it out yourself

H: I need to imagine how big it is. Have you got any in stock?

T: No, nobody uses them any more!

H: I'm going to collect a million floppies. I'm going to make a teragigadactyl. (She's flapping her arms at this point - i think she was referring to a pterodactyl dinosaur)

She was totally serious through all of this, the rest of us were in stitches :D

Blood Money

(A customer walks up to my teller window, and throws two rolls of pennies down. They are covered in wet blood. I try not to look disgusted.)

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry; I can’t accept that.”

Customer: “Why not? It’s good American money.”

Me: “I’m sure it is, but it’s covered in blood; I’m not going to touch that.”

Customer: “It’s fine; it’s just my blood.”

Me: “Excuse me while I get my manager.”

(I happily escape to the back to try to settle my stomach while the manager talks to the man.)

Manager: “Sir, we can’t accept these pennies like this.”

Customer: “It’s perfectly good American money!”

Manager: “Yes, but we can’t take it like this. If you like, I can give you new wrappers. You can re-roll the pennies, and then we can deposit them for you.”

Customer: “F*** this country! My money isn’t good in a bank; it isn’t good anywhere!”*storms out*

Slanged Up Gets You Banged Up

(I work in a second-hand store. We are similar to a pawn store, but we don’t offer loans. It’s been a really hectic day, and my patience is starting to wear a little thin. A wannabe ‘thug-gangsta’ comes in, and throws a few PS3 games at me.)

Thug: “I wanna pawn deez.”

Me: “Sorry man, we don’t pawn. If you’d like to sell them, I’ll take a look for you.”

(The thug nods, and I check the games for condition, and then look up the games for their value.)

Me: “Alright man, given how these games have been marked down, you’re looking at about $27.”

Thug: “H*** no! You know how much I paid for dem?!”

Me: “Yeah, I’m a gamer. I understand what price the games were, but given how old these games are, they’re not worth as much now.”

Thug: “F*** you! They ain’ worf nothin’!”

Me: “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to keep the language down, or take your things and leave.”

Thug: “Who the f*** is you?! You can’t tell me what to do; matter of fact I got the ratchet in the car!”

(Ratchet is slang for a gun. I decide to act stupid.)

Me: “A Ratchet? What kind is it? Snap-On, Mac-Tools? What? Bring it in I’ll see if I can’t get you anything for it.”

(The thug starts to get louder. A regular of mine walks in. He’s a cop, and off duty. He’s watching the thug with an arched eyebrow.)

Thug: “No you fat mother-f*****. I got a gun in the car, and I will shoot you!”

Me: “Sir, do you realize you’re threatening me in front of an off-duty police officer?”

Thug: “Ain’t no mother-f****** police in here!”

(I see the cop behind him pull out his wallet to show his badge, and I just smirk.)

Me: “Turn around.”

(The thug turns around, and sees the badge. He snatches his games off the table, and runs out of the door. The police officer gives me his cell phone number, telling me to call him if that thug comes back.)

via notalwaysright

Hairy Situations Test Your Mettle

(I have very long hair, which I wear in a tight bun per regulation, and I am quite obviously female. A customer walks up to me, but my back is turned.)

Customer: “Sir?”

(I continue my work, thinking she’s talking to a coworker nearby.)

Customer: “Sir?”

(I still don’t pay attention, so the customer taps my shoulder.)

Customer: “Sir?”

(I turn around.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

(The customer is clearly surprised.)

Customer: “Sorry! Can you tell me where [item] is?”

(I point the customer in the right direction. Later on, I’m cleaning one of the registers. The same customer walks up to me.)

Customer: “Sorry about before. I really thought you were a guy.”

Me: “That’s okay.”

Customer: “You should really doing something about that hair. It makes you look too masculine.”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “You look like one of those metal heads.”

Me: “Since when do metal heads wear their hair in buns?”

Customer: “Never, but you still look like one!”

Safari Upload Enabler is Updated With Support for iOS 6

The Safari Upload Enabler tweak from H. Samara & N. Bassen has been updated with support for iOS 6.


Enable native file uploads in MobileSafari! Ever wanted to upload a file on a webpage, maybe on some webmail page using Safari on your iPhone or iPad? It doesn't work because Apple disallowed file uploads from inside Safari.

Safari Upload Enabler brings you this missing capability. It comes with a file and photo/video picker allowing you to upload files like on your desktop computer.


More at iHash.eu

New York Times Apps Will Limit Nonsubscribers to 3 Articles Per Day Starting June 27th

The New York Times has announced that it will only allow nonsubscribers to read three articles per day on its mobile apps starting June 27th. Until now, readers were able to access 10 to 15 articles from the Top News section every day without purchasing a subscription.

After readers click through three articles, non subscribers will be able to browse section fronts and get article summaries. But they will have to become subscribers to read more than three articles. Web subscriptions that include mobile apps range from $15 to $35 every four weeks.

More at iHash.eu

Logitech Harmony Ultimate Hub Turns Your iPhone Into a Remote

Logitech has announced the Logitech Harmony Ultimate Hub for turning iPhone and Android smartphones into a remote. Previously available as part of the Logitech Harmony Ultimate and Logitech Harmony Smart Control products, the standalone hub is great for customers who prefer to use just their smartphone as a remote.



The Logitech Harmony Ultimate Hub lets you control up to eight devices from anywhere in the house using its companion smartphone app.


More at iHash.eu

YouTube App Gets Video Suggestion Overlays, Closed Captions for Live Streams

Google has updated its YouTube app for iOS with video suggestion overlays for what to watch next and closed captions for live streams.



Get the official YouTube app for iPhone and iPad. Stay up-to-date with trending videos and connected with your favorite YouTube channels. Learn and enrich yourself on any topic. Sign in to personalize your experience: get the latest videos from your subscriptions, personalized recommendations, access your playlists, uploads and easily share with friends.


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Rovio Stars Releases Icebreaker: A Viking Voyage for iOS

Rovio Stars, a new publishing brand from the creator of Angry Birds, has released its first game for iOS entitled, 'Icebreaker: A Viking Voyage'.



An epic adventure based on the award-winning flash game! An icy wind has swept the Vikings away, leaving them stranded throughout the land and surrounded by trolls, deadly traps, dangerous enemies, and worst of all… troll snot! Now it’s up to you to save them!

Use your icebreaking skills to solve puzzles and cut your way through ice, rope, cannons, explosives, slime and… err… chickens to get your clan back safely to the Viking longboat!


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Instagram App With Video Support is Now Available to Download From the App Store

The Instagram app has been updated to support video and is now available to download from the App Store.

Customize your photos and videos with one of several gorgeous and custom built filter effects. Transform everyday moments into works of art you'll want to share with friends and family.

Share your photos and video in a simple photo stream with friends to see - and follow your friends' photos with the click of a single button. Every day you open up Instagram, you'll see new photos from your closest friends, and creative people from around the world.

More at iHash.eu

Facebook Announces Video for Instagram

As expected, Facebook has just announced that it's adding video support to Instagram.

Today, we’re thrilled to introduce Video on Instagram and bring you another way to share your stories. When you go to take a photo on Instagram, you’ll now see a movie camera icon. Tap it to enter video mode, where you can take up to fifteen seconds of video through the Instagram camera.

More at iHash.eu

Vine App Gets New Share Button, Interface Improvements

Twitter has released an update to Vine that brings a new share button and other interface improvements.

Vine is the best way to see and share life in motion. Create short, beautiful, looping videos in a simple and fun way for your friends and family to see.


More at iHash.eu

Instagram to Get Video Support on June 20th?

Facebook may unveil plans to add video support to Instagram on June 20th, reports TechCrunch.

As we reported yesterday, Facebook has invited members of the press to a mysterious event on the 20th. Notably, the invite was sent by snail mail rather than email.


More at iHash.eu

New MacBook Air Owners Report Wi-Fi Issues

Owners of the new 2013 MacBook Air are reporting issues with Wi-Fi connectivity, according to a Gizmodo report. The site is experiencing issues with their new notebooks and has also spotted a growing Apple Support forum discussion on the issue.

The problems they’re seeing sound eerily similar to those we’re experiencing with our machines: Wi-Fi will initially connect, but after a minute or two the connection will stop working, and a total reboot is needed to be able to connect again. The problem is made worse when the Air is on a desk, quite possibly something to do with the Wi-Fi antenna being (*we think*) in the black plastic strip along the bottom of the screen.

More at iHash.eu

Apple Releases First Beta of OS X Mountain Lion 10.8.5 to Developers

Apple has released the first beta of OS X Mountain Lion 10.8.5 to developers for testing. OS X Mountain Lion 10.8.4 was released on June 4th.


The new build is number 12F9 and has no known issues. Focus areas in included Wi-Fi, Graphics, Wake from Sleep, PDF viewing and Accessibility.


More at iHash.eu

Apple Presents Closing Arguments in E-Book Price Fixing Trial

The Department of Justice e-book price fixing case against Apple wrapped up today with closing arguments from both sides.



Apple's lead counsel Orin Snyder argued that the agency not only failed to meet its burden of proof but overreached by seeking to prosecute Apple for legitimate business practices.
More at iHash.eu

Apple Posts Entire WWDC 2013 Keynote to YouTube

Apple has posted its entire WWDC 2013 keynote to YouTube for viewing.

iOS 7. OS X Mavericks. iTunes Radio. iWork for iCloud. MacBook Air. And a sneak peek at the all-new Mac Pro. See the unveiling of the incredible hardware, software, and services presented at WWDC.

More at iHash.eu

HBO Developed Apple TV Application Entirely In-House

The Apple TV received a major update recently that brough ESPN, HBO Go and more to the box. After its release Wednesday, HBO's chief technology officer, Otto Berkes, shed some light on why it took so long for HBO to get its content on the Apple TV.



Berkes states one of the main reasons it took so long because it was HBO's first time entirely creating an app with their software and design staff. Usually HBO teams up with third parties to help create and release the applications.

Nothing is more time consuming than writing all the code involved and encoding HBO's massive video library, said Otto Berkes, HBO's chief technology officer, in an exclusive interview with The Verge. He said “optimizing the compression formula to deliver the high-quality video to the lowest bandwidth” is a massive undertaking.

Getting HBO Go on the Apple TV might have taken longer had HBO not begun to boost the number of engineers working at the company's new development center in Seattle. Apple TV was the first app that HBO created completely in-house, said Berkes, a former Microsoft executive who started at HBO two years ago. Prior to Apple TV, HBO teamed with third parties on its apps, but “this was 100 percent created by our software and design staff,” Berkes said.

More at iHash.eu

Apple Updates Apple TV With HBO GO, WatchESPN, Sky News, Crunchroll, Qello

Apple today announced that HBO GO and WatchESPN are now available directly on Apple TV joining the great lineup of programming offered to customers. iTunes users have downloaded more than one billion TV episodes and 380 million movies from iTunes to date, and they are purchasing over 800,000 TV episodes and over 350,000 movies per day.

“HBO GO and WatchESPN are some of the most popular iOS apps and are sure to be huge hits on Apple TV,” said Eddy Cue, Apple’s senior vice president of Internet Software and Services. “We continue to offer Apple TV users great new programming options, combined with access to all of the incredible content they can purchase from the iTunes Store.”

Apple TV users can choose from an incredible selection of programming including over 60,000 movies and over 230,000 TV episodes, as well as the world’s largest collection of music on the iTunes Store. Apple TV also offers great content from Hulu Plus, Netflix’s streaming catalog, live sports from MLB, NBA and NHL as well as Internet content from Vimeo, YouTube and Flickr.


More at iHash.eu

How do you spell 'Internet America'?

Customer: "How do you spell 'Internet America'? Is there a space between 'inter' and 'net'?"
Tech Support: "No space between 'inter' and 'net'. It's spelled normally."
Customer: "Ok. A-M-E-R-I-C-K?"
Tech Support: "That's A-M-E-R-I-C-A."
Customer: "I-C-K???"
Tech Support: "'A' as in apple"
Customer: "There's no 'K' in apple!"

My screen has cancer all over it!

This customer had a thick, thick Appalachian accent.
Customer: "I need help! My screen has cancer all over it!"
Tech Support: "...What?"
Customer: "Whenever I click on something, I get cancer poppin' up all over. Cancer, cancer, cancer, everywhere is cancer poppin' up."
Tech Support: "Cancer? Ma'am, I don't think your computer can get cancer. What exactly are you doing?"
Customer: "When I usin' this, a thing comes up that says action cancer."
Tech Support: "Oh, Action Cancelled? What are you clicking when this happens?"
Customer: "What am I clickin'?"
Tech Support: "Yes, what are you clicking right now?"
Customer: "Rice, beans, and pataters, why?"

Today’s (17.06.13) iOS free apps

Here is list of today’s free iOS Apps.

WorkTimes - Time Tracking with Overtime Calculation - madeFM

CIA : Operation Ajax the Interactive Graphic Novel for iPhone - Cognito Comics

Posing App - SIA MENDO

Net Master - IT Tools & LAN Scanner - Nutec Apps, LLC

My Measures & Dimensions - SIS d.o.o.

Touch LCD - Speaking Alarm Clock - Gareth Clarke

7 Minute Workout - Bytesize


More at iHash.eu

Snapping A Customer Who Snaps

(I am in line at my local supermarket. The customer ahead of me is complaining. I am a cyclist, wearing a helmet with a camera.)

Customer: “What the f*** is taking so long!?”

Employee: “I’m sorry, sir, I will try to get this done as quickly as possible.”

Customer: “I haven’t got time for this; do you know what this is?”

(The customer backs off into a karate position.)

Me: “Excuse me.”

(I turn on the camera on my helmet.)

Me: “You do know that you’re being video recorded from multiple places. Being nice to the staff is voluntary, but threatening them will get the police.”

Customer: “F*** off, or you’ll get dead!”

(The customer pulls out a knife, still in the wrapper. I kick it out of his hand, and he runs off. Between the supermarket and me, we have everything needed for a prosecution. My shopping was free!)

Type 'A' and press Enter.

Tech Support: "Type 'A' and press Enter."
Customer: "Didn't work."
Tech Support: "What did it do?"
Customer: "Nothing."
Tech Support: "Hmmm...I'll send you a new set of diskettes."

The problem happened again.
Tech Support: "Hmmm...send me the diskettes back."

They ran perfectly on my machine. I had her print her config.sys and autoexec.bat files, etc. No problems. I called her back.
Tech Support: "Type 'A' and press Enter."

In the background, faintly, I heard these "tickety-tickety" sounds.
Tech Support: "What are you doing?"

It turned out she was typing, "Type A and press Enter." The error message at the bottom of the screen apparently didn't count as "doing anything."

No Manners In Line Is Out Of Line

(I am a customer. I approach a cashier, with my children in tow.)

Me: “Howdy, do you have any cooking sherry? I didn’t see any on the floor.”

Cashier: “Yes, we keep it up here.”

Customer Behind Me: “Are you really holding up the line for alcohol?”

Me: “You mean, am I a paying customer who waited in line, without harassing the other store-goers, and is now waiting for a product that is only attained at the front of the store?”

Customer Behind Me: “Ugh, disgusting. And your kids are standing right there, too. You’re disgusting.”

My Six-Year-Old Daughter: “She is not disgusting! You are, for being so rude! Didn’t your mommy teach you any manners?! Be patient and wait your turn just like everybody else!”

(The next customer in line behind the rude customer joins in.)

Customer #2: “Seriously, stop being a jerk, and wait you’re turn.”

Customer Behind Me: “F*** this!”

(The customer behind me walks out.)

Cashier: “About time someone told him off. He’s a jerk to everyone he sees.”

My Six-Year-Old Daughter: “That guy needs to learn some manners, or he’s not gonna have any friends!”

Just a moment, sir.

Customer: "I can't seem to connect to the Internet."
Tech Support: "Ah, right. What operating system are you running?"
Customer: "Netscape."
Tech Support: "No, what version of Windows are you using?"
Customer: "Uhhh...Hewlett Packard?"
Tech Support: "No, Right click on 'My Computer,' and select properties on the menu."
Customer: "Your computer? It's my computer!"
Tech Support: "No sir, I mean the little picture called 'My Computer' on your desktop."
Customer: "I don't see an icon called that on my desktop. I do see one called that on my screen."
Tech Support: "Right, just right click that, and choose Properties from the menu."
Customer: "Right click?"
Tech Support: "Just a moment, sir." (mutes phone) "AAAAAAAARGH."

Barking Up The Wrong Family Tree

(Note: I am a teenager.)

Me: “Hey, what can I help you with today?”

Customer: “I have these gift cards, and I would like to exchange them for cash.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I cant do that. It’s store policy, as gift cards have no monetary value.”

(People are starting to line up behind the customer, and they are starting to get noticeably agitated, having to wait.)

Customer: “Excuse me, do you have any idea who you’re speaking to?”

Me: “Not even a clue.”

Customer: “My father owns this store! Now give me my money, or I’ll have you fired!”

(The owner of the store is in the back, so I call him out.)

Me: “Boss, your daughter’s here to see you!”

Boss: “Daughter? I don’t have a daughter.”

(The customer’s face is growing red, and the people behind her start to laugh. I can tell she wants to run away, but she’s in too deep. My boss comes to the front to see what’s going on. My boss is an Indian man in his 60′s.)

Boss: “What are you talking about?”

Me: “This lady right here.”

(The white customer in her early 20s dips her head, and runs out of the store.)

Boss: “Maybe she forgot where her dad’s store is?”

Dropbox Beta for Mac Adds Automatic Screenshot Sharing and More

As noted by MacStories, Dropbox yesterday unveiled new beta versions of its desktop clients, bringing several new features to Mac users including a streamlined method for storing and sharing screenshots.

The first one, an automatic screenshot sharing feature, is somewhat reminiscent of tools like Droplr and CloudApp: once enabled in the Preferences, it will allow Dropbox to redirect every screenshot taken on OS X to a /Screenshots folder in your Dropbox, sharing that file and putting a public link in your system clipboard. While not as full-featured as the aforementioned third-party tools, automatic screenshot sharing could indeed make for a nice solution to quickly share screenshots on Twitter and IM — retaining control over files that are simply located in the Finder.

More at iHash.eu

Intel Shows Off Prototype 128GB Thunderbolt Thumb Drive

Intel introduced a 128GB Thunderbolt thumb drive at the Computex trade show in Taipei today, reports PCWorld. The drive, which Intel is calling the "world's fastest thumb drive," is similar in size to a standard flash drive and does not require an expensive Thunderbolt cable to connect to a Mac or PC.

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Apple new TV Ad - Our Signature

Designed By Apple In California is etched on the back of every Apple product. Here, we explain why.


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Apple released new ad: Designed By Apple - Intention

Here, simple phrases paired with elegant visuals describe the thoughts and emotions that go into creating each Apple product.


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Live Coverage of Apple's WWDC 2013 Keynote

11:59 am	Tim Cook back on stage recapping the presentation.
11:57 am	Supports iPhone 4 ... More at iHash.eu

Apple Announces 'iWork for iCloud' for both Mac and iOS

At today's WWDC keynote event, Apple announced iWork for iCloud, a new version of iWork that is coming for both Mac and iOS later this year. iWork in iCloud brings Apple's iWork software suite to the web, and on stage, the company demonstrated Keynote, Numbers, and Pages operating in a browser window.


The apps are also designed to work seamlessly with Microsoft documents. For example, a Microsoft Word document dragged into Pages for iCloud will be converted and easily read.

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Apple Offers Sneak Peek of Next-Generation Mac Pro

At today's WWDC keynote event, Apple offered a sneak peek of its next-generation Mac Pro, a line of desktop of computers that has not received a significant update in over a year. The preview video showcased a tubular tower design



New generation Intel Xeon processors, ECC memory, and new PCIe flash storage will debut in the new Mac Pro. External expansion will be available via Thunderbolt 2 and graphics will be handled by dual workstation AMD FirePro GPUs with support for 4K displays.


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Apple Announces iCloud Keychain, 1Password-Like Password Manager for Mac OS X 'Mavericks'

Today at Apple's Worldwide Developer Conference Keynote, while talking about Mac OS X Mavericks, Senior Vice President of Software Engineering Craig Federighi announced a new password manager called iCloud Keychain for Safari.

The feature can remember website logins, credit card numbers and ...
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Apple Announces New MacBook Airs with Haswell Processors, Extended Battery Life

At today's WWDC keynote in San Francisco, California, Apple announced new 11-inch and 13-inch MacBook Airs, which have been designed with battery life in mind. As expected, the new Airs use Haswell processors that are designed to offer enhanced performance and improved battery life.

The 11" MacBook Air will now have nine hours of battery life while the 13" Air will have a stunning 12 hours of battery life with the new Haswell processors.


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Apple Debuts new iBooks and Maps Apps for the Mac

At today's WWDC keynote, Apple introduced a new Maps app for the Mac. The app, which is similar to the iOS version, supports Flyover and points of interest. Users can add directions and locations to their bookmarks, which can then be sent directly to the iPhone as the two apps are able to sync with one another.

The new Maps also allows for better system wide mapping integration. For example, the redesigned calendar app incorporates maps, allowing directions to meetings to be inserted directly into calendar events.


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Apple Announces Mac OS X 'Mavericks'

At today's WWDC keynote event, Apple announced the next version of its Mac operating system, dubbed "Mavericks" after a surfing area north of Half Moon Bay in California. Mavericks will feature many new Finder features including tabs, full-screen capability, tagging, and independent handling of multiple displays.

Tagging items allows users to categorize and search for files more easily. With multiple displays, Finder will display a menu bar in each to allow easier control of all apps. Mission Control has also been modified to allow easy transfer of apps between displays. Maverickswill also display apps through a connected Apple TV.



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Apple Announces iOS 7 with Major Design Overhaul

At today's Worldwide Developers Conference in San Francisco, Apple unveiled the latest iteration of its mobile operating system. iOS 7 features a major design overhaul that removes many of the skeuomorphic elements found in previous versions of iOS, instead favoring a clean and gloss-less "flat" look.


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iOS 7 Leak Reveals 'Skinny' Text, Graphics

Newly leaked information about iOS 7 reveals that in addition to a flat design, Apple is also going to be updating the text and graphics in the operating system with a 'skinny' look.



9to5Mac's Seth Weintraub says he's seen an early beta of the operating system but can't post the images because they're watermarked.

The whole OS has that ‘skinny jeans’ Helvetica Nueue Ultra Light or similar that you’ve seen in those posters. At the top, instead of carrier signal bars, Apple now has 5 dots that are white or gray to represent the signal.

The site commissioned Michael Steeber to mockup what the icons and homescreen look like.
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Adobe Releases Photoshop Lightroom 5

Adobe today announced the release of Adobe Photoshop Lightroom 5 for Mac OS and Windows. The product is available as an individual license or as part of Adobe Creative Cloud.

“Lightroom was originally conceived through the requests of Adobe customers, and this feedback continues to drive each new iteration,” said Winston Hendrickson, vice president of products, Creative Media Solutions, Adobe. “As the digital photography landscape advances and evolves, Lightroom is the best solution for photographers and passionate hobbyists who want to get the most out of their digital images.”
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Today’s (10.06.13) iOS free apps

Here is list of today’s free iOS Apps.

Toy Defense HD - Melesta

Puzzle Retreat - The Voxel Agents

Simply North - BusyBytes

Album Flow Pro - Imre Katai

ClipBook - BookMarker & Sentence Collector - JEONG EUI RON

PhotosPro - Photos app reinvented. - LOCQL, Inc.

Poker With Bob - Scary Robot Productions


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Animal-Hating, Manner-less And Bigoted, Oh My

(I’m helping a couple of regulars with finding ingredients for a new recipe. One of them is blind, and has his guide dog with him. Another customer stomps up to us while I am showing them different spices.)

Customer #1: “Excuse me! I need your help.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am, but you’ll have to wait until I’m done helping these gentlemen.”

Customer #1: “No, I need help now!”

Me: “Then if you’d like, I can call one of my coworkers over and they can help you.”

Customer #1: “I don’t want you to call someone else.”

Me: “Then you will have to wait.”

(I turn back to the regulars. The rude customer shoves her way between me and them, stepping on the guide dog’s tail in the process. The dog gives a shrill yelp.)

Me: “Ma’am, please! You could have seriously hurt his dog!”

(Customer #1 shoves the dog aside with her foot.)

Customer #1: “I’m the customer! You have to serve me!”

Regular Customer: “Miss, she has explained to you that she’s busy, and has offered to call someone else to help you. Don’t shout at her, and please don’t abuse my husband’s guide dog.”

(Customer #1 turns to him. The regular customer has an obvious Italian accent, but he isn’t difficult to understand.)

Customer #1: “Get out of here, you d*** foreigner! Don’t come back until you learn some f****** English!”

Me: “Ma’am, he is speaking perfect English. Now if you don’t calm down, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

(Customer #1 shoves me. I lose my balance, and fall. Immediately, the regular customer, who is a well-known boxer in the local area and quite strong, literally picks up customer #1 and carries her out of the store. She screams profanities and slurs at him the whole way. His partner helps me up, and I pay for their spices myself. I also get the guide dog a large steak bone, for when she is out of her harness. The best part? We found out later that the rude customer was wanted for armed robbery, and that she was arrested that day!)

Pricing on Leaked SKUs Corresponds to MacBook Air Models

Pricing on recently leaked product SKUs to be announced at WWDC indicates that they are updated MacBook Airs.

Today, we have received specific pricing for the aforementioned SKUs, and the price-points correspond to Apple’s current pricing for the 11-inch and 13-inch MacBook Air models. We have yet to receive pricing information that points to the imminent availability of new MacBook Pros (as some had hoped), but perhaps the next refresh to Apple’s Pro portables will arrive in the coming months.

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Netherlands Supreme Court Rules Galaxy Tab 10.1 Does Not Infringe on iPad Design

The Supreme Court of Netherlands has ruled that the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1 does not infringe on the design of the iPad.




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Apple is 'Doing Something Really Different' for the New Mac Pro

Apple is 'doing something really different' with the upcoming new Mac Pro, reveals Andrew Baird.

A director, cinematographer, and animator, Baird emailed Tim Cook about the lack of a real update to the Mac Pro over the past few years. Douglas Brooks, a Mac Pro project manager, contacted him about his concerns.

For what it's worth - a couple of months ago I received a call from Douglas Brooks, Apples project manager for the new Mac Pro to address my concerns about the new machine. Obviously he didn't tell me anything about the new MP, but asked me what I wanted to see. I told him expandability for extra graphics cards support, and memory expansion were at the top of my list amongst other things. His reply was simple:

"You are going to be really glad that you waited [to buy a new tower]. We are doing something really different here and I think you're going to be very excited when you see what we've been up to. I can't wait to show this off".

That conversation gave me enough confidence to wait for the new machine. I'm looking forward to the announcement. Hopefully the wait will be worth it.

More at iHash.eu

Today’s (06.06.13) iOS free apps

Here is list of today’s free iOS Apps.

MiniatureCam - TiltShift Generator - John Jung

SubtleColor - Shota Nakagami

Wikiweb - Friends of The Web, LLC

ClassicBooth - misskiwi

Anodia - Clueless Little Muffin

SmartPlayer - Music Player and Last.fm Scrobbler - Shad Deen

AceCam Frame Pro - Photo Effect for Instagram - Nine Curves


More at iHash.eu

Playstation Meets Playboy

(It is just after the release of the video game ‘Playboy Mansion’. In Australia, there is surprisingly no required age limit for the game; it comes with a recommendation only for 18+. A customer approaches the counter with a small boy beside her. She is carrying a copy of the game.)

Me: “Good morning, just that today is it?”

(I indicate the game, and the customer nods.)

Customer: “Yup!”

Me: “I just have to check that you are purchasing this either for yourself, or someone who is over 18. Though there is no legal requirement to be over 18, I must warn it has graphic content and adult themes.”

Customer: “No, it’s for him, but it’ll be alright. He’s eight, but I’ve said it’s okay.”

Me: “I must warn you this game is entirely inappropriate for someone so young.”

(I detail the contents of the game. However, the customer doesn’t bat an eyelid.)

Customer: “It’s still okay. I’d like to buy it for him.”

(I cannot bring myself to cater to this customer, so the manager sells the game to her instead. The customer is about to leave, and I approach her.)

Me: “If you view the game and you’re unhappy, you can return it to us within 30 days for an exchange.”

(The customer is reasonably pleasant about this but keeps dismissing my concerns. The boy skips off happily with her. Two days later, she returns with the boy in tow again.)

Customer: “I’ve come to return this game; I need to get something better for him. It’s not right for him at all.”

Me: “Sure thing. I had a feeling you wouldn’t be happy with it once you saw the content of the game. Sometimes it’s hard to explain just how graphic some of these games can be.”

Customer: “Nah, the game was fine, but you should have warned us about how much reading he’d have to do. There’s far too much to read, and he’s only eight. His reading’s not that good yet. There really ought to be warning stickers for this sort of thing. Have you got anything easier?”